Are your parents divorced, and they don’t get along? Perhaps they have not spoken in years (out of choice). Do they both have new significant others who further complicate the family tree? Are you feeling wedged in the middle and afraid that a quarrel or an all out family feud could break out at your wedding?
If yes, then before you decide to call off the wedding and elope, read on for some ways to help you cope with the potential for family outbursts on your big day.
Accept and indeed expect that there will be some arguments, conflict and turmoil along the way. While the wedding planning and the build-up to the big day are exciting and often exhilarating for everyone involved, it is also a time when a lot of emotions are stirred up in a family. Not all of the emotions are good, so prepare yourself for some riffs along the way.
Be as sensitive as you can to the concerns of family members even if they seem foolish, trivial or unreasonable to you. Although this is your wedding, it is also a family affair that brings family members together that may not be used to being under the same roof all at once. As well, you are joining your spouse in matrimony and creating a bridge between two families.
If there are individuals who threaten to not come to your wedding unless they can be kept apart from someone whom they do not wish to see, then do everything you can to make it happen. Seat your estranged parents apart in the church, and seat them at opposite ends of the head table. If that is still too close for comfort, then make other arrangements. Your objective must be to make your loved ones feel as comfortable as possible at your wedding.
If the warring parties do not like your suggestions, then ask each one of them for their input. Ask them, “What do you suggest? What can I do to make this work for you?” Whatever you do, do not let yourself be manipulated by a family member and realize that your parents (or whoever it is) are responsible for their own behavior before and during your wedding.
You deal with your own family’s issues, and let your spouse-to-be do the same. You are not married yet, so at present you have only your own family to worry about.
